Eurovision 2015: Rating All The Songs From Semi-Final 2

1. Lithuania: Monika Linkyte & Vaidas Baumila – “This Time”

Rating: 8/10

I know this song’s chances of qualifying are low, but I really like this song. It’s super catchy and sweet. The guy is hot. The girl is pretty unnecessary, and she adds a little too much cheese to this already cheesy song, but I have been bopping to this for a while now. The solo version featured on Viadas’ album is better though.

2. Ireland: Molly Sterling – Playing With Numbers”

Rating: 3/10

Pretty boring and forgettable. “Break Me Up” should have gone to Eurovision for Ireland, but let me not get into that right now. This song is just a snore.

3. San Marino: Anita Simoncini & Michele Perniola – “Chain Of Light”

Rating: 1/10

My God this song is awful. It should be serving modern European ballad realness, but instead it’s serving 1997 Disney animated direct-to-VHS sequel title song. This isn’t even good Disney.

4. Montenegro: Knez – “Adio”

Rating: 3/10

Honestly this song made zero impact on me. I’ve heard it a few times but fail to remember how it even sounds. Totally in one ear and out the other.

5. Malta: Amber – “Warrior”

Rating: 7/10

Not the best “Warrior” in the contest this year, but it’s not too bad. It’s a bit cheese-tastic, but this is Eurovision. It does the job nicely.

6. Norway: Mørland & Debrah Scarlett – “A Monster Like Me”

Rating: 5/10

I should really love this song, but I don’t. This creepy pop ballad with a haunting chorus should be one of my favorites, but I can’t get into it. I’ve tried, I really  have. There is just something missing from it. It comes off as really safe, despite being pretty dark. A shame, because it had potential.

7. Portugal: Leonor Andrade – “Há Um Mar Que Nos Separa”

Rating: 5/10

This song is both better than I expected and complete awful at the same time. I have never actually liked a Portuguese entry, and this is no exception, but it’s the least awful entry I can remember them sending in recent history. Small victories!

8. Czech Republic: Marta Jandová & Vaclav Noid Barta – “Hope Never Dies”

Rating: 7/10

This is sort of like a better version of that awful Armenian song. It’s a bit Phantom of the Opera-esque – which isn’t a compliment – but it’s pretty easy to listen to. I sort of enjoy this more than I should. I hope this makes it through to the final, though that seems kind of unlikely.

9. Israel: Nadav Guedj – “Golden Boy”

Rating: 10/10

I’ve already reviewed this song, but a refresher course: this song slays. It’s a mess, but in the hottest way. From the self aware lyrics, to the strange beat that mixes urban pop and Middle Eastern instrumentals, it’s a messy masterpiece.

10. Latvia: Aminata – “Love Injected”

Rating: 1/10

I seriously cannot. I know all of the Eurovision fans love this, but I am sorry I can’t stand this song. It sounds like a banshee shrieking out a chorus while a girl 3 rooms away whispers out the verses. The minimalist beat doesn’t help this song either. What is it with crap songs adding in a couple tribal drums and expecting us all to care?

11. Azerbaijan: Elnur Huseynov – “Hour Of The Wolf”

Rating: 6/10

Azerbaijan is one of my favorite countries at ESC, (mainly due to the fact that they send Meldofiestivalen rejects every year), but their debut entry was not very good. Okay, it was plain awful. Well that guy is back again with a much better song. It’s not fantastic, as the chorus is seriously lacking, but whatever. Even Azerbaijan is allowed to send a bomb.

12. Iceland: María Ólafs – “Unbroken”

Rating: 3/10

I love Iceland, and I SHOULD love this song, but it’s actually too annoying to enjoy. I thought I liked it at first, but after a couple listens I realized it’s too cheap and repetitive to like. The Icelandic language version is more tolerable though. The song seriously lacks a hook. It’s basically just a bunch of repeated verses that never form into a chorus. Iceland stay the only Scandi country to never win 2k15.

13. Sweden: Måns Zelmerlöw – “Heroes”

Rating: 10/10

I’ve already reviewed this. Flawless + iconic + winner + when will your faves + ect.

14. Switzerland: Mélanie René – “Time To Shine”

Rating: 7/10

I sort of like this song. The  lyrics are contrived, but the production is pretty nice. Poor Switzerland never does well at Eurovision though.

15. Cyprus: John Karayiannis – “One Thing I Should Have Done”

Rating: 3/10

Ugh, Cyprus. When will you finally have your moment? Poor dears.

16. Slovenia: Maraaya – “Here For You”

Rating: 4/10

This super over-hyped Duffy reject just doesn’t do anything for me. Eurovision is known for being late to the party music trend wise by a year or two, but this “Mercy” wannabe is like 5 years too late.

17. Poland: Monika Kuszynska – “In The Name Of Love”

Rating: 2/10

I seriously loved Poland’s 2014 entry “Slavic Girls,” so it pains me to hear this generic cookie cutter ballad. This is the last thing we needed in a contest full of boring ballads.


About FlopstarReviews

I love flop music and I am here to share that with you. My twitter is @ShayneOfficial
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