Cheryl (née Tweedy, formerly Cole, newly married Ann Fernandez-Versini is silent) has released a new single and artwork for her new album! The good news? The [standard edition] artwork is positively mind blowing. The bad news? Everything else! We all know I am a life long Chezza Solider and will literally fight a bitch who hates on queen C, but even I have a hard time stanning for this new single of hers.
Let me just get the good points out of the way first, as here on Flopstar Blog we love to keep a positive attitude at all times. The album artwork for the standard edition of her new album “Only Human” is probably the best album cover of 2014. Not probably, it definitely is. Cheryl is serving major Lara Croft: Tomb Raider vibes with the wet hair and next level gaze. I want to frame it and display is as art on my wall.
So as for what I don’t like, there’s the messy deluxe cover. It’s basically the same photo with some really amateurish editing which ends up ruining it completely. Also her new single “I Don’t Care” is both a mess sonically and visually. Upon first listening to the song itself I immediately burst out into uncontrollable laughter, likely to keep myself from crying. The production sounds like a dusty demo from Jem & The Holograms 80’s cartoon remade into a midi file on garage band by some guy in his basement. Who is allowing her to release this type of trash? The video for the song is almost worse. It was shot in Spain, but basically looks like it was filmed in LA. The heavily filtered and poorly edited clip serves major Heidi Montag “Higher” video teas, except in Heidi’s case it was hilariously fun whereas it’s kind of sad coming from the UK’s biggest pop icon.
Homegirl needs to get it together before her loyal subjects lose their minds. I am hoping the upcoming album has some good tracks on it, because so far both this new single and previous single “Crazy Stupid Love” has been train wrecks. At least she is still pretty to look at, though!